The question of whether being in a second marriage is considered sinful from a Christian perspective is a deeply personal and theological one, and it can evoke strong feelings among believers. In many Christian communities, second marriages—especially those that occur after a divorce—are viewed through the lens of biblical teachings on marriage, divorce, and adultery.
While the Bible has specific teachings on marriage and divorce, interpreting those teachings and applying them to modern life can be challenging, particularly in cases of remarriage after divorce. Are you actively sinning if you’re in a second marriage? To understand the Christian perspective, we need to examine the biblical passages, the intent behind divorce, and God’s view of marriage and reconciliation.
What Does the Bible Say About Marriage and Divorce?
To answer whether a second marriage is sinful, we must first look at what the Bible says about marriage and divorce, particularly in the teachings of Jesus and the Apostle Paul.
1. God’s Original Design for Marriage
From the beginning of creation, God designed marriage as a permanent and sacred union between one man and one woman. In Genesis 2:24, it says:
- Genesis 2:24:
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”
Marriage was intended to be a lifelong covenant, with deep emotional, physical, and spiritual unity. This foundational understanding is central to the Christian view of marriage.
2. Jesus’ Teachings on Divorce and Remarriage
In the Gospels, Jesus addresses the issue of divorce and remarriage. His teaching emphasizes the sanctity and permanence of marriage, and He provides specific exceptions when divorce is permissible.
- Matthew 19:3-9:
“Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?’… Jesus replied, ‘Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.’”
In this passage, Jesus acknowledges that divorce was allowed in the Old Testament under certain circumstances (such as infidelity), but He stresses that it was not God’s original design. Jesus allows divorce in the case of sexual immorality (often understood as adultery), but He also says that remarrying after divorce, except in cases of infidelity, would constitute adultery.
- Mark 10:11-12:
“Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”
This teaching by Jesus underscores the belief that remarriage, after an unjustified divorce (i.e., not based on sexual immorality), is seen as adultery. Jesus’ words make it clear that, in His view, divorce should be an exception, and remarriage outside of that exception could be considered sinful.
3. Paul’s Teaching on Marriage and Divorce
The Apostle Paul echoes Jesus’ teaching on marriage and divorce but also provides additional insights on how Christians should approach divorce and remarriage within the context of the church.
- 1 Corinthians 7:10-11:
“To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.”
Paul’s instruction here reinforces the idea that divorce is not ideal for Christians, and if divorce does occur, reconciliation or remaining unmarried is the proper course of action.
However, Paul also addresses the situation where one spouse is an unbeliever, allowing for the possibility of divorce in such a case.
- 1 Corinthians 7:15:
“But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.”
In cases where a Christian is married to an unbeliever and the unbelieving spouse chooses to leave, Paul suggests that the believer is not bound to that marriage and is free to divorce and remarry.
Is Remarriage After Divorce a Sin?
Based on the teachings of Jesus and Paul, remarriage after divorce can be seen as sinful in certain circumstances, but not all cases. Here are the key scenarios in which remarriage may or may not be sinful:
1. Remarriage After Divorce Due to Adultery (Sexual Immorality)
According to Matthew 19:9, Jesus allows for divorce and remarriage if the divorce was caused by sexual immorality. In this case, remarriage would not be considered sinful, as the divorce itself was justified.
- Matthew 19:9:
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
If you are in a second marriage after a divorce caused by adultery or sexual immorality, many Christian traditions would argue that you are not sinning. This is because the divorce was permitted by biblical standards, and remarriage is seen as allowable in such a case.
2. Remarriage After Divorce Without Biblical Grounds
If the divorce was not caused by adultery or sexual immorality, remarriage can be seen as sinful according to Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9. In these passages, Jesus describes remarriage after an unjust divorce as committing adultery:
- Matthew 5:32:
“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.”
If your second marriage is the result of a divorce that was not biblically justified (such as for reasons other than adultery or abandonment), it would be viewed as a sinful remarriage in many Christian denominations.
3. Remarriage After the Death of a Spouse
The Bible permits remarriage after the death of a spouse, as death ends the marital covenant. Romans 7:2-3 and 1 Corinthians 7:39 affirm that a widow or widower is free to remarry without sin if they choose to do so.
- Romans 7:2-3:
“For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man.”
Thus, if your second marriage comes after the death of your spouse, this would not be considered a sin.
4. Remarriage After Divorce and Reconciliation
If someone has divorced without biblical grounds but then reconciles with God and seeks to restore their marriage, it could be encouraged for the person to remain unmarried or seek reconciliation with their original spouse, as suggested in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11.
However, in some cases, the remarriage could be seen as an act of grace and forgiveness in the eyes of God, depending on the situation and the hearts of those involved. Some Christian denominations might not view the second marriage as sinful in this context, particularly if there is a genuine desire for reconciliation with God and the spouse.
What Should Christians Do If They Are in a Second Marriage?
If you are in a second marriage and are wondering whether you are sinning, it’s important to approach this question prayerfully and with humility. Here are a few steps you can take:
1. Seek God’s Guidance
Pray for wisdom and understanding, asking God to reveal His will for your life and relationship. The Holy Spirit can give you clarity on how to move forward.
2. Examine the Circumstances of Your Divorce
Consider whether your divorce was biblically justified (i.e., caused by adultery or abandonment). If it was, your second marriage may not be sinful.
3. Talk to a Pastor or Christian Counselor
Seek counsel from a pastor or a Christian counselor who can provide biblical insight and guidance tailored to your specific situation.
4. Live Out the Principles of Marriage
Regardless of your marital history, focus on living out the biblical principles of marriage—love, respect, selflessness, and commitment. A second marriage can be a reflection of God’s grace and redemption if done in accordance with His will.
Conclusion: Is Remarrying After Divorce a Sin?
In conclusion, whether or not you are sinning by being in a second marriage depends on the biblical grounds for your divorce. If your divorce was due to sexual immorality (adultery) or another biblically permissible reason (such as abandonment by an unbelieving spouse), then remarriage is not considered sinful. However, if the divorce was for reasons not aligned with biblical teaching, remarriage may be seen as sinful in many Christian traditions.
Regardless of your situation, it is always important to seek God’s grace and forgiveness, and to approach your marriage with a heart of commitment, love, and honor to God. A second marriage can be a new beginning, one that reflects God’s redemptive power in your life.